London Marathon #13: 8 weeks to go

This week my mind was turned to a self-leadership lesson around authenticity. Why do so many of us find it hard to just be who we are? First, the training sessions completed in the past week...

• Tuesday: Tempo run, Kanawaza, Japan. This run was 12km, done at a bit faster pace than I will be running the marathon.

• Wednesday: Walk, Seathwaite, Lakes District, England. Walking at a brisk pace for 50 minutes. This helps with recovery for the next hard session. This walk included the historic Stockley Bridge (see below), constructed in 1540. It is classified as a Grade 1 listed building given its historical significance. For hundreds of years, bridges like this one enabled goods including salt, wool and charcoal to be transported to and from the Lakeland valleys by pack animals.

• Thursday: Interval run, Maasai Mara National Reserve, Kenya. This run involved a mixed bag of fast intervals, followed by a recovery of the same duration at a moderate pace. Distance covered, not including a 10-minute cool down, was 8km.

• Friday: Walk, Moeciu de Sus Village, Romania. Walking at a brisk pace for 50 minutes.

• Saturday: Long run, Chicago, USA. I did this one as a progressive run, starting off easy and building to the pace I will be doing for the marathon for the last 45 minutes. Total of 30km.

• Sunday: Easy run, around the streets of town. This run is done at a very easy pace, 12km.

• Monday: Walk, Verdon Gorge, Cote d'Azur, France. Walking at a brisk pace for 50 minutes.
  

There are lots of little sayings floating around that touch on the idea of authenticity...

• "What you see is what you get"

• "Such and such is fake"

• "Let's get real"

• "He's putting on a show"

• "She's genuine"

• "Just be yourself"

To get along in the world we have to put ourselves out there, interact with others, have a presence. Just to be clear, an authentic person is not that person that:

• regardless of the environment they are in, shares anything and everything.

• is always happy to speak up and tell others why their own view of the world is the correct one.

• has an opinion on everything and everyone.
  

An authentic person is someone who understands who they are, what they value, and what they believe in. When this person engages with the world their external interactions and behaviours align with their internal values and beliefs. They are being themselves. They also understand that not everyone is the same as them, they are thoughtful about when and where to assert themselves, they realise sometimes the best course of action is to say nothing (and that is not being inauthentic).

Showing up as our authentic selves is not straightforward for at least two reasons:

Firstly, we have an innate need to protect ourselves, which means when we find ourselves in situations where being authentic may harm us, we become more discerning about what we do and say that reveals the real us. You've probably heard certain managers bang on about team members needing to be more authentic. Ironically, they are often the very people who pose a threat to others because they don't create a safe environment for team members to be themselves.

Secondly, lack of confidence often gets in the way. What if people think I'm weird? I'll be judged! How do I handle criticism? I might get emotional, then what will people think of me? Last time I shared I was made to feel stupid. Sadly, there are plenty of people in the world that feel threatened by those who are different from them. The way they protect themselves is to vilify those differences. Of course, the better approach is to acknowledge the differences, make an effort to understand, and give others the confidence to step into their authenticity.

When you feel safe and confident to be authentic, you have enormous power to reach others who think they are on their own and to help them.

"Knowing yourself is the beginning of wisdom" - Aristotle